In honor of Men’s Mental Health Month, Kevin’s story provides an eye-opening look at the challenges many men face and the importance of seeking help. His raw and honest recounting on TikTok (@radical_kindness_) sheds light on the often unseen battles that can lead to significant personal growth and resilience.
Raw confession
Kevin starts his video with a stark admission:
“I burnt my A-level cert, drank my own pee, ate my dog’s shit, danced in my mom’s nightgown. Basically, I went insane. I woke up from a hospital bed in IMH and thought to myself, ‘Kevin, you’re fucking pathetic.’”
During this dark period, Kevin’s life was marked by extreme highs and lows. Despite making nearly S$40,000 a month, he felt cursed, writing numerous suicidal notes and coming close to ending his life. Recognizing the importance of Men’s Mental Health Month, he decided to share his full story to inspire others.
The Pressure to Succeed
Kevin’s story shows a common issue many men face: the immense pressure to succeed. Kevin was raised by perfect parents who saw him as a miracle and provided him with exceptional financial, social, spiritual, and educational support. With these, he thrived academically.
He also excelled in school and sports, representing Victoria School in badminton and later switching to tennis, even representing Singapore.
However, the constant praise and success led to an unhealthy dependence on other people’s validations. Kevin explains, “Praise is not necessarily a good thing because your self-esteem starts to become dependent on variables, your grades, your achievements, other people’s opinions of you.”
He pointed out that beneath all these praises, a subtle yet dangerous shift was occurring in his mind. This marked the beginning of his mental health challenges.
The Breaking Point
The pressure reached its peak during his A-Levels at (RJC) Raffles Junior College. He recalled a time when he was certain he would never experience the anxiety that his grandmother had gone through, only to find himself suffering from severe anxiety right before his A-levels.
Despite studying 14 hours a day, anxiety overwhelmed him, leading to blank exam papers and a complete mental shutdown. At the time, academic success was everything to him. Reflecting on those days, Kevin acknowledged that “grades mean nothing to me now,” but back then, the pressure was intense.
The societal belief that “if you have no A-Levels, you have no future” weighed heavily on him, leading to extreme stress. Fortunately, Kevin eventually completed his A-levels.
Going down a spiral
Following this and despite completing his A-levels, Kevin faced an even darker phase of his mental health journey. Kevin recalls, “I woke up that night in cold sweat, and suicidal thoughts entered my mind. I was afraid because I couldn’t control it.”
His mental health continued to deteriorate, leading to constant distressing thoughts and disturbing visions. “Death thoughts of myself being chopped up, hanged, blood everywhere and I (even) imagine my funeral.”
This severe state of mind resulted in his hospitalization, where he was given medications and tranquilizers and faced what he felt was the lowest point of his life.
During his hospital stay, Kevin battled depression and persistent suicidal thoughts, describing it as “just a constant battle” with painful, repetitive thoughts. Through time, support, and mindset shifts, he eventually found a way forward.
Rediscovering Self-Worth
Kevin’s journey to recovery began with volunteering at dog shelters and with kids with cerebral palsy. He realized, “They did not care whether I had straight A’s or straight F’s. They only cared that I was there serving them, loving them and they gave me back that love in return” This made him realize that he had value beyond just academic success.
However, his recovery was not easy. After realizing that his value was beyond just grades, Kevin went through a manic episode. Days where he couldn’t sleep and became obsessed with the idea of becoming a YouTuber to “save Singapore.”
He made a four-hour video where he did extreme things like burning his A-level certificate and drinking his own pee. His friends stopped talking to him, and people thought he was going crazy.
Despite this, Kevin found mentors through a friend who helped him balance his life. With their support, he learned interpersonal, intrapersonal, and intellectual skills. From this, he eventually shut down his YouTube channel and focused on his mental health.
Turning Pain into Purpose and Pursuing Dreams
Kevin’s journey continued at Wee Kim Wee School of Communication and Information, where he was accepted through discretionary admission. Despite his questionable appearance at the interview, his passion and dreams shone through. He wanted to build a platform to promote compassion, inclusivity, and resilience in society.
Falling in Love with Training
While in university, Kevin discovered his love for training and teaching. He started training in schools, sharing his story and focusing on resilience and mental health. He realized that students paid the most attention when he talked about failure and personal stories. This inspired him to start his own company, specializing in resilience and mental health training.
Building Rebound with Resilience
Kevin’s final year project, “Rebound with Resilience,” aimed to raise resilience among secondary school students. With funding from the National Youth Council (NYC) and Learning Lab, he conducted programs in schools, gaining marketing experience and transitioning naturally into entrepreneurship.
He registered his ownership in April 2019, marking the beginning of his mission to inspire and support others.
The Importance of Men’s Mental Health Month
As we observe Men’s Mental Health Month, Kevin’s personal journey sheds light on the challenges men can face. By sharing his story, he contributes to normalizing discussions about mental health. Kevin’s transformation from despair to resilience shows the importance of seeking support and redefining one’s sense of self-worth.
Watch the video here:
@radical_kindness_ 1/2. In lieu of mens mental health month. #menmentalheath #mentalhealth #sgtiktok #sgfyp
Source: Tiktok
Photo & video credit: Tiktok
More from Wake Up Singapore:-
Byeon Woo-Seok’s Kind Gesture Shines Amid Security Controversy
Singapore’s First Residential Addiction Treatment Centre Opens Doors in 2025
Meet R. Kabilan: Manhunt Singapore 2024 Finalist and Fitness Advocate
If you have a story or a tip-off, email admin@wakeup.sg or get in touch via Whatsapp at 8882 5913.
Since you have made it to the end of the article, follow Wake Up Singapore on Telegram!
Wake Up Singapore is a volunteer-run site that covers alternative views in Singapore. If you want to volunteer with us, sign up here!
If you can, please do consider buying a mug or two to support Wake Up Singapore’s work!
